Chapter 2 – Listening – Part 2

In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.
Psalm 5:3

Did something traumatic occur in your life that caused you to give up on being an artist? Or did you gradually spend less and less time practicing your art until you were out of the habit?

Certainly nothing traumatic ever happened to me. I think peer pressure and criticism happened to me and a healthy dose of adulthood. I used to sing solos. I knew I wasn’t the best. But I could sing and I did. I was willing. I think it was about senior year and we had several shows to deliver. The song my choir director chose for me was a good song that was finally in my new, voice-changed range. I loved it. But there was this word “power” that was sung over and over. And apparently I have a Midwestern twang that was just painful on the ears. She worked me over how to say that word. But she had a habit of doing it right before a performance and I didn’t hear her correctly. I was dealing with butterflies. Normal and natural, but she didn’t have my ear. One day in particular she really was at me about it, and I had other issues going on and I threatened to not sing it. So she let me be, but I never sang another solo.

The other issues were my peers teasing me. And I didn’t need that.

I did take choir in college for one year. And it just wasn’t worth the effort. We never really performed. I wasn’t good enough to be in the choir that did that. And I really didn’t care for the songs we sang. I was used to either Show Choir or church choir and this was neither.

Exercise 2: The Way We Were

Think back to the last time you felt really creative. How old were you? What were you working on and how did you feel about being an artist at that time?

I started feeling creative about seven years ago, maybe eight. When I was young, I was always creating and doodling and coloring. Then, in high school, college prep attacked me. I had time for one thing and one thing alone. I chose choir. It made sense. No one even suggested an art class. I certainly didn’t think of it.

So about the time I was 32, I was asked to paint something big. I think someone asked if I could do it, and I said yes. I knew I could paint, just didn’t have an opportunity. And I monster was born. Now I live for the times to paint.

First I was working on backdrops for Vacation Bible School and then I was working on Displays for the Children’s Department. One place I was working with paints. The other place, I was using different mediums and a bunch of staples!

And how did I feel? Amazing. I am always amazed when I am done. Amazed that it can be done.

Back to something that made me stop doing it … well, apparently the big grand over the top displays are not worth so much effort. Because when I’m working on them, it doesn’t look like I am working. And it would be in all of our best interest to always look busy … And looking back, that really sapped the creativity out of me.

May the words of my mouth and the mediation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.
Psalm 19:14

Hahaha. There was no 2 Samuel 4:13. So now I don’t feel so bad that I forgot it!

Ben-geber, in Ramoth-gilead (he had the villages of Jair the son of Manasseh, which are in Gilead, and he had the region of Argob, which is in Bashan, sixty great cities with walls and bronze bars);

1 Kings 4:13 (ESV)